Larry’s Leadership Moment

Reflecting on the Turtles in my life, I've come to realize that they not only possess wisdom but also create a nurturing environment of safety. It's a journey that requires us to slow down and invest the time and effort to truly connect with them. While the Turtle’s slow-and-steady pace may challenge some, the transformative results are undeniably worth the journey.

Do you know someone who has natural charisma? This person can naturally talk to anyone about anything at any time. I know a person who has those qualities. He is fun to be around and seems to have tons of friends in his life. The truth is that many mistake his natural people skills for joy or fulfillment. They think that his extrovert personality equals always being happy and on top of the world. He is misunderstood. Once he became aware of a few things about himself, he was able to communicate with others on a deeper level.

We were walking at my favorite place in the world, the beach. Specifically, the beach in Gulf Shores, Alabama. Lately, the shorelines are filled with seashells. They arrive in all shapes, sizes, and colors. As we were walking, my wife, Melanie, said, “They all have one thing in common… they are broken”.

I know a couple who have very different perspectives. She is a detail-oriented Camel, and he is a big-picture Lion who is not detailed in the least. They struggled to communicate and to hear what the other was truly trying to say. Things changed when they learned to speak each other’s personality language. The husband said that learning how to communicate with his camel wife was truly a game changer for their relationship. Here are 3 things to remember when communicating with a Competent Camel:

A leader was trying to communicate with a colleague who has a Lion personality. The Lion made many assumptions, dominated the conversation, and totally did not hear what the other person was trying to say. This resulted in frustration and damaged their working relationship. It is important to understand how to communicate with Lions. Here are a few things to remember when engaging with a Lion:

I love this time of year. It’s the month that some call “March Madness”. While I’m pumped about this season of basketball, I am more excited about our own “MADness”. For us, MAD stands for Make A Difference, and we use it to refer to our personality assessment that has been taken by over a million individuals in the last 25 years. For us, that statistic is exciting not because of the number of times our profile has been used, but because of the number of people and relationships that have been impacted and strengthened as a result.

I have observed thousands of relationships and have definitive proof that all successful relationships take work. Those who allow their lives and interactions with others to become stale and stagnant will eventually fail at being fulfilled in their relationships and ultimately, in their life. The problem is that many simply do not understand how to do the work of building and sustaining healthy relationships. Maybe the desire is there, but investing in the wrong things leads us in the wrong direction when it comes to connecting with others.

For those who are in broken or difficult relationships, Valentine’s Day may seem to pour salt in an open wound. Some will try to ignore all the fuss about love and get to the other side of all the red and pink cards, hearts, and candy as quickly as possible.

I have another idea. Why don’t we celebrate a different type of love this week? What if we use all the hype and advertising blizzards to remind us that we can choose to love life and all of the opportunities that we have every day? We can show love by buying a cup of coffee for a stranger, smiling at someone we normally don’t notice, or taking the time to stop and genuinely listen to someone who could use an ear. Maybe bring a Valentine to someone who’s struggling or down on their luck. Maybe pay a compliment to the very next person you see, no matter who it is.

Brandon couldn’t see over the table. He wheeled himself over to a lower table in the store and asked me to bring my computer over there. I complied but wondered how he was going to work on my computer when he has very little use of his hands and fingers. As I talked with Brandon, I learned that he was working toward a leadership role in the company. He demonstrated strong people skills and was incredibly effective at diagnosing my computer problems. He had adapted so that his environment and physical limitations were no longer impossible obstacles but were assets that he used to pursue his goal of becoming a manager.

He looked at me and said, “I don’t care”. My friend and I were discussing things that were very important to him, but as we talked, he would call out things things that came up that just did not matter to him. He went on to say, “I can’t care about things that are not a priority. If I care about everything, I then can focus on nothing.”